


Hard Truths

by Kraebutt



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Canon Compliant, Established Relationship, F/M, Fanart, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Minor Character Death, POV First Person, slightly AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2017-05-03
Packaged: 2018-10-27 03:35:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10800864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kraebutt/pseuds/Kraebutt
Summary: If someone had told me that “Today is the day that you die”, I would have just laughed it off as a humorless joke.





	Hard Truths

**Author's Note:**

> I am looking for a beta, inbox me if you are interested! I edited this to the best of my ability, so I hope it isn't too boring.

[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/146369343@N04/34286161721/in/dateposted-public/)

If someone had told me that “Today is the day that you die”, I would have just laughed it off as a humorless joke. You see, the world we live in today is surrounded by death. The wasteland is often the biggest killer of them all. The wasteland was built on the shoulders of people filled with hate. And I can’t help but feel that this is a cycle that is perpetuated again and again. We cannot help it. We, as a species are jealous, petty and suspicious and will kill to gain. With the creation of mutants, raiders and the plethora of creatures that kill to survive, death is inevitable. Sometimes it comes too soon, especially when someone could have done something to stop it. I knew that I too would succumb to the life cycle of the wastes. I just didn’t think that would be today. 

. . . 

Let me back up a little and tell you a story. 

I grew up in a vault. Rare, I know. But I wasn’t born in one, which I didn’t discover until I was much older. My mother, Catherine named me Adrian and died shortly after giving birth to me. My father, James, terrified for my safety, convinced the Overseer of vault 101 to allow us to stay. Being a scientist, his skills were invaluable to those in a decaying vault. Out of the hundreds of vaults designed to fail for Vault-Tec’s experiments, this one was one of the few that did not. By the time I was nineteen, my father disappeared, leaving me behind in the hopes that I would be safe. Sadly, the Overseer was a petty and jealous man and sought to exact his revenge upon me in my father’s place. My friend, and his daughter, Amata, saved my life. She warned me in time to make my escape, and that I did. 

I tried for weeks to discover my father’s whereabouts while traveling the wastes. Looking for clues in the many established communities. Places like Megaton, Rivet City and others that were filled with people trying to survive. I discovered that I had a talent for uncovering valuable scrap and junk in my travels to sell in exchange for information or caps. Sometimes I would spend a few days in one location or another, either on mission or just searching for clues, clearing a site of it’s valuable hidden treasures. There was a man I helped a few times with stories I would share and artifacts I could find that were hundreds of years old. Made even before the great war. He created a museum of sorts, dedicated to those artifacts and the history of the world before the war. 

During my travels, I made a friend who aided me with scrapping and defence. We spent a lot of time together helping people who were unable to help themselves and providing aid to communities. We shared a lot with one another. All of the ups and the downs. We worked hard and scavenged harder. Over time, we saved enough caps through payment of jobs or selling scrap to purchase a bay in the marketplace of Rivet City so that we could set up a shop. Cutler remained behind and managed the shop for me. He was better with people than I anyway. During this time, I gathered more valuable scrap to sell while I searched for my father. It took nearly a year of searching to find a clue. During my search, I helped many people and communities, earning me the nickname of the Lone Wanderer. People often had heard of me before I had even met them. It was surreal. I didn’t understand, why wasn’t anyone else helping people? It just seems natural to help those in need so that is what I did. I tracked my father down in a vault that was used for a twisted computer simulation. It was disturbing on levels I cannot even describe. My father had been imprisoned inside the simulation and in order to free him, I had to make the decision to sabotage the simulation which killed many of the people who were also imprisoned. I still feel regret to this day of the innocent lives lost. 

Once reunited with my father, we returned to the Jefferson Memorial where he worked on Project Purity with other scientists in the hopes of providing fresh, clean water to those of the wastes. It was something I wholeheartedly wanted to help with. People were dying every day because there was no clean water for crops or even just to drink. I helped my father re-activate the systems at the memorial that he and the other scientists built in the years before my birth. We were successful, but in doing so, we drew the attention of the Enclave. I can still hear the anger and fear in my father’s voice. I raced as fast as I could through the sublevels to get back to him to help him. Protect him. But men in strange power armor impeded my progress. Thanks to all the practice, I had gotten rather good with a rifle. So I was able to sneak up on them and pick out weaknesses in their armor. Still, they were difficult to take down, especially if there were multiple men nearby. I don’t know what kind of weapons they wielded, but the munitions burned deeply when I was struck by them which also slowed my progress. 

When I made it back into the center of the rotunda, my father closed himself in with a few other men, including those in the power armor and another called Colonel Autumn. I stood beside Madison Li, another scientist, and we watched in horror as my father, in an attempt to keep Project Purity for the people of the wasteland, activated the machine and flooding the room they were in with radiation. My father killed himself to save both myself and the other scientists. Madison nearly dragged me away. I was angry, sad and horrified. I wanted to scream, cry and tear into the room to try and save him, but it would've been fruitless. All that time spent searching for him, only to lose him again a couple of days later. But she insisted that we needed to escape because more would be coming and I was the only person out of the group of six of us that had experience with survival in the wasteland. She directed me to escort the group through a series of hidden tunnels that would bring us to the Citadel, the base of operations for the Brotherhood of Steel. I had come across a few wandering patrols in my travels before. They were exclusionists, which was a damn shame and tended to keep to themselves, but they weren’t out to hurt others. 

When we finally arrived, she demanded to be allowed access. She isn’t someone I particularly care for due to her brusk demeanor and dismissive attitude, but she is rather brilliant and about as stubborn as my father. And she was the only person who could continue my father’s work. Once inside, I met the leader of the Brotherhood, the Elder Lyons. The scientists were treated for any wounds they sustained and given a place to sleep and some hot food to eat. It was extremely late and Elder Lyons felt that it would be better to continue the discussion in the morning. I was escorted to the base doctor to have my burns treated, as well as any radiation sickness I may have been experiencing. The doc told me that the enclave used plasma weapons, which is why it burned so much. While there, a young boy came into the room with curiosity in his blue eyes. He announced himself as Squire Maxson. Little did I know that this young boy would later change my life. 

The doc asked Squire Maxson to lead me to the bunkhouse so that I could get some rest for the following day. As we made our ways through the halls of the citadel while pointing out certain areas of interest the boy asked me a lot of questions and I did the same in return. His thirst for knowledge and curiosity was endless. He was really intelligent for a boy his age. But looking around, I could see why. There were no other children in the base. He only had books and adults as friends. He told me what it was like being in the Brotherhood and what they stood for. I don’t think have ever heard anything else that would be more fitting for my life. He did say that they do not recruit outsiders, but they have in the past. Perhaps I could enlist with them one day. For now though, a bed sounded wonderful. 

. . . 

In the days that followed, I made frequent trips to and from the Citadel on errands for the Brotherhood as well as for Madison with a Star Paladin Cross as my travel companion. She was incredibly resilient and a sturdy travel companion. I also brought back little trinkets that I thought young Arthur would get some enjoyment from. I returned to Rivet City frequently to drop off any salvage I could find and introduced Cutler to the Star Paladin accompanying me. He immediately tried to flirt his way into her pants and nearly succeeded. After a couple of days of rest and trading, we were nearly ready to go into Vault 87 to retrieve the G.E.C.K. that was needed to purify the waters of the Capital Wasteland. 

I returned to a small village ran by children to speak with their foul mouthed mayor, MacCready. He had mentioned in a previous visit that there was a vault nearby and that it was dangerous to attempt to get in because it was filled with super mutants. According to some of the logs I pulled from the vault that imprisoned my father, the vault MacCready spoke of was the same vault that had a G.E.C.K. With some work, Cross and I gathered up as much RadX and Rad-Away as we could find and made the journey to Little Lamplight. There I spoke to another boy named Joseph about unlocking the computer so that we could hack it to get in. It took some time but we were successful and when the door swooshed open, the stink of death and decay flooded your senses. Star Paladin Cross collected relevant data from the surviving terminals as we progressed through the vault, eliminating any super mutants along the way. She said the vault would get marked for extermination at a later time, which was a relief. We had a mission and we needed to focus on that to get through the nightmare of Vault 87 and its monstrosities. 

We barely made it out of the vault alive. We were ambushed on the way out by Autumn and his men. We were too sick from the radiation to put up much of a fight by that point. They utilized some sort of gas that knocked both myself and Star Paladin Cross unconscious. I woke some time later in a small holding cell in a room I didn’t recognize. I was stripped down to just my under clothes and there was evidence that I was treated for radiation poisoning. I still felt nauseous. I was in some sort on machine that paralyzed me. I couldn’t move an inch. A man on the loudspeaker claiming to be “President Eden” wanted to have a conversation with me and I was promptly released from my containment despite the protestations from Colonel Autumn. All of my possessions were in a nearby foot locker. Once free, I cautiously searched the nearby rooms, but I could not find Cross. Pushing back my concern for her, I made my way through the maze of hallways toward this so-called president. The man insisted that I would be safe and ordered his men to stand down. It turns out though that Autumn was not in agreement and ordered his men to shoot on sight. Still exhausted from the trip to the vault, the fight to Eden and the surface took way longer that I would have liked. 

Once in the correct room, I discovered that Eden was nothing more than an artificial intelligence created from the memory map of a long dead man and the exact definition of what the Brotherhood sought to destroy. This machine hurt hundreds of people under the guise of being the true president of the United States. It was nothing more than a tyrannical piece of machinery. I managed to convince it to destroy the base and everything inside citing that it was the very product of the reason the world became a wasteland. A countdown began and the AI used the automated security to help me to escape with the G.E.C.K. and a modified version of the FEV in hand. He wanted me to use it when I activated the purifier, but I plan to give it to Elder Lyons instead. I have seen enough super mutants to give me nightmares that will last me the rest of my days. I made it to the surface, but it was not long after I made it outside that the base exploded, rocketing debris in all directions. The sound deafened me and a large chunk of the mountain side struck me, knocking me unconscious. 

. . .

I woke some time later in the medical wing of the Citadel. A team of Knights and Scribes found Star Paladin Cross who led them to where I was, unconscious. Not that they would have missed the massive explosion at Raven Rock Mountain. The rock that knocked me unconscious is going to leave me with a scar bisecting my right eyebrow. I had a couple dozen stitches put in to hold my face together. Aside from the deep black eye that was a result of the injury, I still looked like myself in the mirror. I could see a little of my father in my face as well. Young Arthur came down to see how I was doing and to bring me a message. Now that we have possession of the G.E.C.K. we can re-take the Jefferson Memorial from the small garrison of Enclave soldiers. Leaving a thanks with the Citadel Doctor, I gathered my supplies and followed the young Squire to the Laboratory where the strike team was assembled and waiting. While we walked I retrieved the latest book I found for Arthur from my bag and passed it to him. I love seeing his face light up with excitement. When we reached the doors, he excused himself and raced away, book in hands toward his personal quarters. 

Inside I found the entirety of Lyon’s Pride waiting and ready to march out and Sarah Lyons, the Elder’s daughter and leader of the Pride issued orders and discussed tactics with her crew. I stood beside Scribe Rothschild as he began the booting sequence for Liberty Prime, an enormous robot from before the Great War. They had spent a long time repurposing it to aid them in the upcoming assault. Star Paladin Cross was there waiting for me, ready to continue our mission. I really did admire her tenacity. It was here that the Brotherhood taught me how to use power armor and provided and older set that was still in working condition. I don’t know how I managed before without power armor, but this changed my whole world. As Prime ascended to the surface, I followed the pride to keep up with the giant machine as it marched to the Memorial. The pride worked like a well oiled machine. They were efficient and powerful. I desperately wanted to be a part of that. For now, I had to focus and followed Sarah’s orders without question. 

. . . 

When we reached the rotunda, Colonel Autumn was there, ready to give us a fight. I tried to change his perspective. Convince him that this was not the way to help the world. I nearly had him convinced but he refused to back down. We entered into a firefight that lasted some time before we successfully brought Autumn and his guard down. From here, Madison spoke to us from the Citadel remotely. We were faced with an extremely difficult choice. I really did not want to die. But I would not let Sarah go in, either. This is something my father believed in from its inception. He put his blood, sweat and tears into this project. And in the end, his life. For my father and for those dying of thirst and starvation, I went into the chamber while Sarah deliberated with Madison over the intercom, putting an end to their argument. Sarah was horrified, but I could see pride in her eyes too. She told me to be quick, I could already feel nausea and irritation beneath my skin. I felt as if I were being cooked from the inside out. 

My vision blurred and my nose started bleeding profusely as I entered in the code to activate the machine. I knew it by heart.. The passage that my mother loved so much. Revelations 2:16; I am Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the water of life, freely. As I hit enter, a blast from the machine, an enormous punch of radiation knocked me from my feet, making my vision tunnel and narrow until all I saw was the face of Thomas Jefferson within the tank of clear water. We did it. I closed my eyes knowing that my father’s work was done. 

. . .

What I did not expect was to awaken some time later within the all too familiar clinic room inside the Citadel. I still felt sick and weak, but I did feel better. The soft voice of Arthur brought me to consciousness. Carefully I sat up with the assistance of the Doc and took in my surroundings. My skin was so pale I could nearly see through it. Beside my gurney, Arthur sat with the book I gave him, open to the page he was reading aloud. On the other side of him, Sarah Lyons lay hooked up to an array of machines and tubes, still unconscious. The boy’s eyes widened when I sat up. He must not have noticed that I was awake. The doc issued me some medication to combat the symptoms and extensive damage the radiation had caused. He told me that I had been out for weeks and Elder Lyons would like to speak with me once I had awakened. 

As carefully as I could, I made my way toward the Elder’s office on unsteady feet. I felt weak. I worried about what Cutler must be thinking. Upon entering the office, the Elder stood and shook my hand, thanking me for my sacrifice. He described what happened in the moments after activating the purifier and how they distributed the water to all of the surrounding communities. They made sure that Cutler knew of my condition and provided additional scrap and supplies to our little shop for my service. He said that he would be willing to grant me a request. Remaining quiet for some time as I deliberated on a response, in the end I requested that with the backbone of the Brotherhood’s teachings and service, they could make an enormous change in the Capitol Wasteland. They could expand their ranks by giving citizens of the wastes an opportunity to change their lives. I suggested that he start recruiting which would go a long way to earning the people’s trust. The Elder humored me and said that he would give my recommendation some thought. He said that I would be welcome to visit the Citadel at any time, citing that my gifts of books and toys to Arthur increased the boy’s morale resulting in a marked improvement in his studies. I am happy to know that I can continue to visit Arthur. 

After my meeting with the Elder, he said that a pilot would stand by to take me to Rivet City when I was ready to go. I collected my things from the bunk they provided me, did a little more trading with the quartermaster, and made my my to the surface where a Vertibird awaited my presence. The engines spun up when Star Paladin Cross greeted me. The smile that graced her normally stern countenance warmed me. She gave me a hug and wished me well on my travels. I never saw her again after that moment. I later learned that she was killed in the line of duty clearing a super mutant nest. I vowed to eliminate any mutants I came across in my travels in her memory. It was exhilarating riding in the flying machine. The view from above was incredible and expansive. I had never seen the city from this high before. The ride was short however leaving me on the flight deck on top of Rivet City. I watched the vertibird disappear around the dilapidated structures before going inside to find the marketplace. Cutler greeted me jovially and we celebrated with drinks and food with the other shopkeepers as I shared the story. 

. . . 

Some time later, after recovering from my injuries, I found myself enlisting with the Brotherhood. It blew me away that the Elder took my recommendation seriously, opening up the Brotherhood for recruitment. Cutler and I joined immediately, eager to make a change in our lives. We gave the shop to a friend I made in the wastes that gladly took the opportunity to find a place to stay. Cutler and I were assigned to the same platoon and went on many missions together. We rose through the ranks quickly due to our dedication and determination to prove our worth to the Brotherhood, earning both of us the rank of Knight, complete with our own set of power armor. Our superiors felt we worked well together and agreed to keep us together. There was about two weeks into an op that things changed. 

It was during this op that I would die. 

We infiltrated a den of super mutants. I don’t really recall exactly what happened. The rest of our five man team had been wiped out. These mutants were particularly vicious. A generator nearby erupted, and a shard of metal slipped in through a gap in my armor. The pain was so intense that I blacked out. I awoke some time later, in a strange area. It looked a bit like Rivet City, but everything was off. There were tubes connected to my body in different places. The stench of blood made me nauseous. It was then that Cutler, with a grim expression came around the divider. The damage is too extensive. The metal severed my spinal cord, paralyzing me. The damage to my organs were too severe to come back from. I knew I would die one day, but I never thought it would be like this. Cutler, my dearest friend brought me to this doctor with the hopes of saving me. The Citadel was too far. The doctor explained to me that the only way he could save me is to transplant my memory into something called a synth. A living, breathing machine, except not a machine. They have bone, muscle and blood like a human and function just like humans do. I don’t know if I understood everything he tried to explain to me. But basically this synth was on the run and needed a new identity to be safe. Its… His, your name was M7-97. You looked nothing like me at the time, but the doctor said that we have similar bone structures and builds, so he could make it work. You would receive my likeness and memory to live on in my name.

Because the memory transfer could cause some damage which will cause them to alter the memories that will be implanted, the doctor and Cutler urged me to make this recording. To you. I hope you understand. This must be frightening and confusing. I hope this will help you understand where I, we come from. I hope that you continue to help people in my stead. I hope you survive. They said that you will essentially be an exact copy of me and should continue right where I left off. And I hope you do. Cutler is a good man and the Brotherhood of Steel is an admirable organization. I don’t know if they will even know that you are not entirely me. But Star Paladin Cross was a cyborg, so in a way, I will be too. Thank you for taking the time to hear my story. I hope you have so much more to add to this story. 

. . . 

Adrian Danse, M7-97, listened on with a stoic expression, brow furrowed and seated at the end of their shared bed, hands steepled before him with his elbows on his knees pensively as the holotape clicked to a stop. It was a lot to process. Anger, sadness and confusion roiled within him, making tears prick at his eyes. Julia, the sole-survivor of vault 111, a remnant from before the great war, his partner, lover and Sentinel of the Brotherhood of Steel, ejected the tape from her Pip-Boy and held it before her from her chair at the desk in their room. She watched in silence as his somber brown eyes filled with tears, no words leaving him for many moments. She gently set the tape on the desk without looking and stood, brushing off her jeans and stepped closer to him with soft steps from booted feet. Her hand lifted and slipped into the dark tresses of hair upon his head, nails gently scraping across his scalp in a comforting gesture. His hands dropped and circled around her waist, pressing his face into her soft belly with a deep sigh, inhaling her familiar, warm scent. His frame shuddered as she continued to stroke his scalp through his hair, murmuring to him gently. 

The flash of her wedding ring that had been given new purpose caught her eye. Her new husband’s shoulders shook with the weight of this new information, shedding all his fears and grief in the comfort of their home. The man on the tape shared with him the truth of his past. That he was willing to give him his entire identity to live on through him. “I know this is a lot to take in. You are not alone, love. We will do it together.” Adrian’s breath hitched and he tilted his head back to look into the blue eyes of his wife. She too had horrors and trials from the wasteland that she survived. She understood what he felt. He no longer thought or spoke of himself in a derogatory fashion. It took a lot of arguments and discussions between them to make him realize that the was human to her. And she was the reason for that. 

Julia found the tape a few hours ago. She had been setting up racks and storage to put away their weapons when they weren’t in use. When she brought his personal possessions from the Prydwen, inside there was a box of items that had once belonged to Cutler. He had been given them when Adrian shared that his comrade was killed in action. He had never opened the box nor seen the contents. Except for the double barrell shotgun with a wooden stock. It had been Cutler’s favorite weapon before they joined the Brotherhood. He had given her permission to take a look at what was inside so that the items could be sorted and stored. It was then that she found the gun. She had been cleaning it in hopes of giving it back to him as a gift from their marriage. She discovered as she cleaned the weapon that the end of the stock was loose and when she opened it, she found the holotape hidden inside. All that was written on it was “Adrian’s Will,” and brought it to him for clarification. Adrian hadn’t seen it before and they listened to it by way of explanation.

He had no idea how much this would change his life. The last few months since discovering that he was in fact a synth, he had hated himself and the Institute for possibly killing a man just so he could take his place. But now he has the proof and relief of knowing when exactly his real memories began. When he became Adrian Danse. He clutches her to him, grief and relief rolling off of him as he processed what he had just learned. Knowing that he had the real Adrian’s blessing made it easier to live, and survive with his life, his future and his wife. It was then that Adrian whispered his thanks and lifted his head, meeting her eyes to pull her down into a kiss. Her lip, so plush and still cracked from the dry weather, brushed over his, teasing his possessive side. He pulled her to him so that they lay together upon the bed. Holding one another as they watched the sun set over the horizon through the window of the home they built together. 

THE END

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Any constructive criticism is accepted!


End file.
